Don't worry...it's not too bad, though if you would have asked me the night of our Dr. appointment with Dr. Pineda I would have told you it was as bad as as it was going to get.....after over three weeks now I feel like I can share :)
So there we were, at our first IVF consultation. We had been waiting a month and a half for the appointment - thats how long it took us to get in. This particular clinic is known around the world - pretty incredible it is here in St. Louis! To say I was a nervous anxious mess is the understatement of the century. I couldn't sit still all day at work let alone think about anything but that appointment at 3! We were meeting at the Dr's office and both hadn't been there before so I gave Bryce VERY specific directions in how to get there, where the office was, etc along with specific direction to be there 15 min early. I had been pouring over the details of the information I had to bring and be prepared with for a month and wasn't going to be late after all that! Well they actually took me a few minutes early and Bryce was a couple minutes late - NO COMMENT! :)
He finally made it and we had a few questions with the nurse. Now...I know my cycles better than anything at this point but I was so nervous I even had trouble answering some of the most simple questions! I was a wreck! From there we got right in with Dr. Pineda - who was a very sweet guy. I could tell he honestly wanted to answer my qeustions and listen to what we had to say. The only problem was he didn't tell me what I wanted to hear...."If you have insurance that covers fertility treatments you shouldn't come to our clinic - you need to go to Wash U"
Excuse me? I'm sorry...I just waited a month and a half for you to tell me that after 15 min of my consultation? It was very hard for me to focus on anything else that was said - I was trying too hard not to burst into tears. You see..I am about as Type A as it gets. Everything is planned, I's are dotted and T's are crossed 25 different times and I am ALWAYS prepared with everything in situations like this but somehow I didn't ask that question? I felt heartbroken and angry with myself. Dr. Pineda did shed some light on some additional things about my condition I hadn't heard before - that there may need to be a special procedure along with my IVF to ensure fluid wasn't building up in my tubes during the procedure - it will be good to know when I meet with my NEW doctor to ensure they can perform the same procedure. Overall he was a very sweet guy and I am sad I don't get to work with him. Essentially their clinic has made a decision to require up front payment from all patients regardless of insurance coverage (I am in the minority that have fertility treatments covered) - he was very clear that he did not want us "playing the insurance game" and hoping to be reimbursed in full. Wash U accepts insurace up front. So that was it...off we went home (after a co-pay of course). I was a mess and Bryce was going to do anything he could to make me comfortable (which that night happened to be Popeyes Chicken and a few glasses of wine...yes I am an emotional eater).
So we start over. I called Wash U the next day and OF COURSE the earliest I could get in was APRIL 8. Good lord a month and a half never felt so long - it might as well have been a year away. One question I asked this time was when I could actually start my IVF cycle - finally some good news. They would start with my next cycle after my appointment which will be late April. At the previous clinic I would have had to wait 2-3 months to work into their schedule. All in all I don't think we lost any time in the grand scheme of things but holy cow was that alot of emotions to get through! I will now be seeing Dr. Valerie Ratts who is part of the Wash U Infertility clinic - they work as a team so there will be 5 doctors reviewing my case and my protocol.
We are back playing the waiting game with lots going on outside of the IVF world. I just got back from a great trip to New York with my neighbor friends, my best friend Tessa is getting married at the end of the month, St. Pattys Day festivities are coming up and this weekend our favorite UNI basketball fans are coming into St. Louis. All things to celebrate and enjoy in the moment. I saw a quote a couple weeks back - "Life is not a destination, it's a journey" It was exactly what I needed to see at the time. This whole process feels like one milestone after another - Beginning of cycle, Middle of Cycle, End of Cycle, next appointment date, etc, etc. I need to keep in mind that while we are going through this there is this thing called life passing us by - and there is alot of great stuff going on there that we don't want to miss!!
So thats the update - sorry for taking so long but it took a while to gain perspective (one that wasn't negative and depressing that is) :) So here's to another month/month and half of injection free freedom!
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